Monday, May 27th
You might have thought that we watched a scary movie with a title like that, but you would be wrong. It was one of Blake Edwards’ early movies starring Lee Remick and it was anything but terrorizing. It was filmed in San Francisco, which is where my mother and M grew up so they both loved seeing the city. I had visited a number of times when I lived in Los Angeles and I even recognized a church that was in the movie.
Humphrey was extra lovable, as he usually snuggles beside me, but this time he climbed right on top of me and I petted him the whole time he was on me. We have discovered that he loves munching on a potato chip. He definitely recognizes the sound of a crinkling wrapper and he will walk around the bed to be closest to whoever he thinks will give him an extra snack. We will occasionally give him a small part of a chip. My sister had baked me some gluten-free cookies and M put one down on me. H rushed in and started eating the cookie. Well, he likes them!
Tuesday, May 28th
I need to sit up in my chair more. Lying in bed is nice, but your neck muscles get weak, as does my arm. My wheelchair also wants to be driven every day. I was thinking I would get up Tuesday, Thursday and Friday. There are usually fewer CNAs on the weekends so I can't depend on being able to be put in my wheelchair. Anyway, I got in my chair and went down to the other end of the hall, where the dining room with the amazing view is. I came back and went into the small dining room across from my room and spent the rest of the day there.
I had my phone with me the whole day, of course, but I have not programmed ringtones. I also do not like the calendar that comes with the iPhone. It is way too detailed. So I hadn't been looking at my schedule and I completely missed an appointment with my nutritionist, who gives me the pills I take. That really pissed me off.
Wednesday, May 29th
That's one advantage to getting up, you appreciate staying in bed even more the next day. The more I get up, the easier and less of a hassle it will be. I just watched things and worked on my next essay. I thought I would write something really easy. I thought of a topic, but it is not turning out funny. I will keep trying.
Thursday, May 30th
I was supposed to get up today, but I was feeling sorry for myself because my sister and my mom are both going to Maui to see my cousin's son graduate from high school. My sister will FaceTime me so I can see the ceremony as well. (She was irritated; she hadn't thought of that.) I’ll show them! I won't get up, and then won't they feel bad. Sure, when they get back. And they probably would, too.
I wrote more on the essay, but it is still too straight. It needs some punching up.
Friday, May 31st
I was planning to get in my chair today, and then I heard the nurse talking to my neighbor about her doctors appointment that she would be getting up for at 9:30 AM. That meant two things, they would be using the Hoyer lift to get my neighbor up and it would be very quiet for a while. So I stayed in bed. I have been wanting to write something about my neighbor, but I do not want to do it while she is listening. This would be a wonderful time to write in quiet and in solitude. I ended up enjoying the solitude so much I forgot to write anything except for some blog entries.
Saturday, June 1st
Another day to try to not think about who is not visiting me. Heavy sigh. I really need to find someone else who can bring Humphrey to me. I don't think mom gets how important his visits to me are. I'm sorry but missing visits is from people is one thing, but missing visits from my sweetie, who feeds my soul is quite another. I really wanted to burst into tears but it all just felt too futile and I am so disabled I can't even dab my tears easily with a tissue. I was really in a bad mood. Think of me saying a long line of bad words that I won't re-create here for the sake of propriety.
I have decided not to write an essay for June 1. I will put the title Summer Vacation on the front page and write a little blurb griping about how people want me to churn out the essays. No more!
Sunday, June 2nd
I had an early, warm shower before breakfast so I could be done in time to watch the Zoom of the graduation. One of the best things to come out of the pandemic was the common use of video for doctors visits, church services and other things. Another example is how making something more accessible benefits everyone. After the ceremony, my sister FaceTimed me so I could say hi to people.
I again felt very bummed about being alone and in this place. At the same time, I did not necessarily want to get on an airplane now that my core strength is zero. On the flight to get to ʻOahu the nurse had to hold me up the entire flight, and that was a year and a half ago. My core strength is less than that now and I do not want to go through that again. It's just a bummer to experience life in little five minute snippets. And I do miss going out to dinner with my cousin and her family. It's good to have rich relatives. Sorry, that's my inner freeloader coming out.
I will now attach the photo of Humphrey in my mom's suitcase as she was packing to leave. Anyone who has a cat and a suitcase is familiar with this scenario.
Have a great week!
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