Monday, February 17th
My mom and sister went on a whale watch, so it was just M today, and he lived close enough so he just walked to me. He got to me about half an hour earlier than usual and we ended up having a very in-depth conversation for about two hours. For as different as our lives are, we have some interesting similarities as well. When we finally got around to picking a movie, we thought we should take advantage of being just the two of us and watch something Mom would not like.
M chose this movie based on a Philip K. Dick story. As I had only gotten 4 1/2 hours of sleep the night before, I ended up napping during much of the movie. When he left, I watched the movie again with headphones on so I could appreciate it. It's a decent B movie starring Peter Weller. It's nice when a movie set in the future isn't riddled with horrible anachronisms.
Tuesday, February 18th
It used to be Friday was the most difficult day to think of what I did, but now it is Tuesdays where I draw a blank. Ah, the black hole of the week. Hey, six out of seven isn't bad.
Wednesday, February 19th
Since Monday was Presidents’ Day, the doctor made his weekly visits today. And I was supposed to change my catheter on Monday, so it happened today. It turned into another conversion of a suppository/shower/doctors visit, but this time my regular, quick CNA was on duty. She cleaned me up in minutes and then the doctor came. So I had my shower after breakfast today. You never know what series of events need to get shuffled on any one day.
Thursday, February 20th
The first Freddie Day in two weeks! As I was trying to restart our connection, I had been saying hi to him at various points during the previous week, and I was eager to see if it made a difference. Dr. R had gotten a kitty stroller to make carrying him around easier. I had just finished brushing my teeth when she got here so she left the stroller by the bed and rinsed out my toothbrush.
Freddie was inside the stroller, thinking, ’Hey, we're here! I know that voice! Let me out!’. He started meowing and clawing at the inside of the stroller. She came back, let him out, and he jumped onto the bed and immediately settled down on my leg/knee. I reveled in the familiar feeling of a cat’s weight against me. I told my therapist that I had been saying hi to him during the week and we both agreed it made a difference. I was thrilled! I think he was finally able to connect that the voice in his head was me. And for me, it's amazing how much mileage I get out of an hour once a week.
Friday, February 21st
I prepared for my sister's visit by adjusting the projected budget a little. Except for one smaller expense I had not accounted for, I mainly slashed the budget to make things more realistic. It was way too padded and now it was just padded. I was doing everything I could to reduce my budget so I could afford to get the supplements. I knew I needed to be very even-keeled when talking to my sister about them. I also knew I needed to change my attitude about the pills and how me and my mom and my sister interact while guarding them. Thank you.
Saturday, February 22nd
My sister showed up with two packages of sushi from Whole Foods. She wants to find another place to get sushi from because she doesn't want to give Jeff Bezos any more profit than he already has. That should not be difficult to do here in Hawaii. We also finally watched the last episode of the first season of Lioness. This is not the best environment to watch anything.
We finally got around to talking about the pills. On Tuesday, my sister will come to me at 3 PM for a 15-minute conversation with my nutritionist. I'm hoping that will go a long way toward resolving this issue between us. She asked me what else I think helps me (other than the supplements) and when I said ’a cat’ she agreed with me! I was a little surprised and she reiterated that she was looking to either rehome one of her cats, or deal with three. How fabulous!
This brings up an interesting dilemma for me. My sister is thinking if Freddie visits me regularly, two cats visiting me would be even better! What I want is to feel a close connection with a cat and I'm attempting to do that with Freddie. I'm not sure if adding another cat is a good thing to do. I'm certainly capable of loving two cats at the same time, but for some reason I am hesitating a little. I think I'm still stuck on Humphrey and how possessive he was. He did not want my attention divided at all. This would be a completely different situation. More on that TBD.
My sister signed me in to her Hulu account. I remember when that first started and one of my caregivers at the time added me to her account. She was paying a lot each month for no commercials and lots of the extras. When Hulu started, it really was a clearinghouse for all of network television. Now, every channel has its own service so there really isn't a reason for it anymore except they have original shows of their own. And they show movies. I had heard about the movie Longlegs so I went ahead and watched it.
Sunday, February 23rd
I had listened to a review of a new movie called Monkey, which sounded interesting and was directed by Osgood Perkins, son of Anthony Perkins of Psycho. That sounded very intriguing, as there is a lot to mine from Norman Bates. Watching a horror movie alone at night I knew could be a recipe for disaster, but I fell asleep just fine. I have discovered the trick to watching horror unscathed. You cannot let yourself get sucked into the movie. Remember you are watching a movie and remove yourself from the experience of it. Works for me.
Nicolas Cage does an amazing job of playing the serial killer very creepily. He has a voice, a look, and a physicality completely separate from his own. It's quite an accomplishment and extremely unsettling. Blair Underwood, who also became famous during my teenage years, was the second lead, and that was fun. I could not stop thinking about the movie all day today. I told Mom and M about it, and Mom likes Nicolas Cage, so we might watch it together at some point. I like to torture myself sometimes.
The cover photo is me in my UCLA T-shirt. It took a while to purchase because I took so long to fill out the form online that I timed out and my sister had to complete it later. I like this design, and it was older so it was less expensive. The T-shirts are a way of fundraising, and the new designs can be pricey! I'm glad to have this in my wardrobe rotation. Have a great week!
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